Caramel, mango,
coffee, and raspberry.
Broken macarons sit
in a clear plastic box
on the top shelf of our fridge.
Cinnamon and vanilla,
pumpkin and pistachio,
they’re sold for two dollars a piece
at the bakery where Sofia works.
But broken, they are worthless.
She rises early to ring up
quiche and almond cakes,
twists and espresso
at the bakery in the mall.
Freshman classes are virtual,
so she’s saving up for a car
and a trip across the country.
The tooth first touches a stiff veil
like the crust over snow at night.
Then chewy meringue surrenders
into a soft heart
before it melts everywhere.
An exact degree of humidity is required
for satiny but strong domes,
rough but frilly crowns.
The softness of the macaron’s collapse
equal to the precision of its construction.
On the days when Sofia
comes home, extracting
from a crinkled white bag
a few broken macarons,
she smiles as if to say,
What misfortune and what luck.
She adds them to the
plastic box in the fridge —
chocolate macarons filled with chocolate ganache,
lemon with lemon curd buttercream,
apricot with apricot jam.
“You can each choose one,”
she tells her brothers,
extending the open box to them
in the middle of their Nerf gun fight
as if offering bonbons to princes.
Crushed, cracked, or chipped,
our macarons will never
surprise a dinner party hostess or
commemorate an anniversary.
They are eaten with
grubby hands that have
just formed snowballs
from sidewalk slush.
Popped into mouths between
handfuls of corn chips
and streams of potty words.
Appreciated if not for the form,
then for the content:
“Passionfruit is so good!” Luke says.
“It’s like sweet and sour!”
Macarons were born
as dollops of almond meringue
in the monasteries of medieval Venice.
Priest’s bellybuttons
they were called
when Catherine de’ Medici
married King Henry II and
brought them to France.
The Parisians transformed bellybuttons
into three-layer pastry shop tartlets.
When Sofia first mentioned
macarons,
I had the vague sense
that I had missed
some chic fad.
Perhaps out of rebellion
for being left out,
or a lack of respect
for broken things,
I ate my first one
as if it were an ordinary cookie
that thought very highly of itself.
“I’m grateful for macarons,”
Diana said one evening
when I tucked her in.
Now I try to eat each one
knowing how hard they were to make,
how delicate and once beautiful.
And how the baker, knowing this too,
keeps making them again and again.